In Case You Don't Know

Setelah berkali kali membaca 'Dunia Shopie'

Aku akhirnya bergeser ke Elizabeth Kostova's 'Historians'

In case you don't know

'Historians' is a novel wrote by Elizabeth Kostova

Hiding story about Drakula

Eastern Europe back in the 1.400s A.C

So sad, so naive, and so silly

About 15 years old girl, sleeping with 20 years old boy, doing something stupid

Doing the old things

We both love Liam Gallagher

Yeah, I'm talking to you.... 

Am I Getting Better?

Suddenly, my brain visualizes 3D motion in this head.

Right after, my heart recalled something strong about friendship from the past.

Things that came to mind after the heart felt so deeply about resolution.

About friendship that came along from years and years behind.

Strange thing in the night.

And the vision brings it back into my feelings.

Are you alright, my old friend? 

This is a vision about nights when we were younger doing old things like the ones before. 

Drinking and laughing and loving everywhere around your place.

And possibly didn't give a damn about the future. 

This past haunts me again.

While I'm not really lonely, but chilling about yesterday so suddenly. 

Am I getting better? 

"Justin never know the rules..."

"Justin never know the rules..."

Hari ini hari Jumat

Sejumput lirik '1979' from Smashing Pumpkin mengembalikan sesuatu yang tersita oleh waktu sepanjang weekday

Lagu berganti...

4 Non Blondes

"Oh my God, yes I pray every single day for a revolution!!!"

With 'Bitter Sweet Symphony' after that, 

So magical! 

And FYI, that's the reason I love holiday very fuckin' much. 

Because, it's only music and the dream

And the most important thing is, 

It's only me

In my life

Taking time, 

Respectfully,

Waiting for you

Only. . . 

Eksistensi Sudah Mati

Robot-robot akan binasa. 

Tepat setelah mereka mampu bersuara

Eksistensi sekedar basa-basi saja

Rasa cinta yang mudah mati

Namun harus mati-matian pula untuk mempertahankannya

Robot-robot akan binasa. 

Kelak ketika mereka sudah terlalu mencandu terhadap keindahan cinta

Semuanya dibalikkan hanya dengan sedikit pembalikan fakta belaka

Eksistensi sudah mati

Hari hanya berganti hari

Bulan hanya berganti bulan

Tahun hanya berganti tahun

Dan 9-to-5 menjadi satu-satunya realita

Eksistensi sudah mati

Banyak yang berganti hati dan lari

Ada juga yang hidup menyendiri

Mendengarkan bisikan penuh makna

Dari dirinya sendiri

Eksistensi sudah mati

Robot-robot akan binasa

Billie Eilish

Billie Eilish pengen kayak Cardi B

Rap Disco yang menyengat urat saraf dan memaksa jiwa dan raga untuk bergoyang

We Not Humping

Disco yang terhampar di gurun gangster

Lalu lari ke dalam semangat In Da Club 

50 Cent

Feeling my style, feeling my flow

Shot shot shot and shot! 

Dan having fun di tengah teriknya matahari

Bernama pekerjaan

California Love

Lalu menerobos melalui lirik elegan

Tupac dan Dr. Dre

In the city of LA

West Coast

East Coast

After Tupac Hit 'em Up

Young, Wild, and Free was born

So what we get drunk? 

So what...? 

Conclude the Big phase with that song

The song about how we should extremely hard to the bad things inside us

That called:

Young, Wild, and Free! 

Repeat! 

Young, Wild, and Free! 

And what's inside my heart, that's all about you... 

that's all about you... 

Yogyakarta

I love this town

I see places, I see my past, lovely past

My history

Youngsters full of love

And free

Made mistakes

And free

Just like how I used to be

We feel pain

They feel pain

When it hurts

We were going to a little lovely place called 5 dimensi

Dengan begitu, maka tahulah kau kalau sejauh ini kau berteman dengan siapa

"Aku dibawa terbang ke alam mereka," kata Kaka

Namun, senyum manis ternyata tidak seperti di dalam lagu-lagu cinta

Di mana kita merasa mendengarkan, padahal tidak, 

Dan masih banyak sisi diri yang perlu diisi arti

Memang, hidup ini hanyalah realitas belaka

Pemalu, dan sedih

HEART

I'm looking on it

And it's the wild behind the wall

A mount's not buried in it

And clouds hide a thing on it

And

The town makes me looking down

Into the earth that I don't belong

Then I fly myself with these unique wings

And the bad suddenly become a thing

So, what is it? 

Psikososial

Hampir setiap malam aku berkelana

Dengan isi kepala ini, aku mendengarkan lagu-lagu melankolis ala Adam Levine di platform streaming terkenal. 

"Get so insecure, doesn't matter anymore"

Lalu, tidur menuju siang yang bangkang

Keras terhadap kesempatan yang ditawarkan oleh hidup. 

Dengan penuh keyakinan, kukatakan kepada seluruh alam semesta, bahwa aku hanya terlalu keras terhadap kenyataan-kenyataan aneh yang diberikan oleh mimpi

Sedikit-sedikit kukatakan kepada diriku, bahwa di dunia ini ada cerita yang lebih menarik dari rahasia

Ditemukan melalui bahasa kalbu yang perlu dilatih hanya untuk menerjemahkannya

Sore Hari, 

Aku masih duduk berhadapan dengan pekerjaan yang penuh dengan kira-kira. 

Hingga pukul 5 baru pikiran ini mulai terbangun dari tidurnya

Membawa bersamanya alam bawah sadar yang sudah siap untuk diuji

Pukul 6 sore, ketika azan berkumandang, barulah diriku ini meminum segelas kopi hitam panas tanpa gula

Waktu pun kemudian terasa singkat

Sebab, pada pukul setengah 8 malam, tidak ada hal paling mengundang rasa malas selain harus memenuhi janji dengan sesuatu yang semu

Aku pun tak mengelak. Meskipun aku hanya berkeringat dan kembali merasa kosong

Dan tidak mungkin mengulang masa lalu yang belum menghilang

Taman pikiran yang dulu pernah kubangun untuk menyambutmu, kini suram tanpa tanda-tanda kehidupan

Kecuali pohon-pohon tua yang kian rimbun sehingga menutup celah bagi sinar matahari untuk masuk

Aku pun harus bergerak lebih berani demi menciptakan kembali kehidupan-kehidupan pasca bencana tanpa rencana yang terjadi beberapa tahun lalu

Kesedihan yang meninggalkan bekas, kerinduan yang meninggalkan banyak pertanyaan sebelum akhirnya disadari bahwa tidak ada kekecewaan pada masa lalu. 

Permainan masa lampau yang sesekali mampir ke dalam mimpi

Mimpi-mimpi itu sendiri, kian lama kian indah untuk dipahami

Tengah Malam

Aku kembali menyiapkan diri menuju tidur. 

Instagram 

Identitas

Identitas

Identitas

Dan penyakit psikososial

Kemudian, terjadilah peristiwa yang membuatku menuliskan puisi panjang ini

Dengan isi kepala ini, aku merasa tenang seiring dengan terdengarnya kemerduan suara Rihanna.. 

Comedy Store

I wanna make a fuckin' poem
About the guy who bought the flower from the comedy store
He bought a very gently flower of rose
'I'm not going to put it in anywhere else, but your heart," said He.

But, when He did that, nothing happened more than silence
He wondered. Why? He thought carefully. How?

When He found out the reason, He remembered something about the comedy store
"The things there," He thinks, "are very bizzare,"
He found a gypsy's thing in the book called Don't Cheat on Your Dream

And He found a black old cat, looking sharply to the corner where the potrait of John Lennon got hung
Above the big shell contain by a bunch of strange books

But His mind just going places faster than ever
Looking for the truth about the flower
Searching for all the things that might be forgotten

And then He remembered, the strange receipt of the rose.
He felt something
Got the receipt in His hands

He read:

For all the native son of the laughter, of the love, of the life, of the journey and living a dream, and of the skies that wrote all the stories about the stars..

If you can find this flower, and you're about to meet the third decade of your life, I want to tell you, that there's no way for you to learn the same lesson.

Life's change so much
And love now is just the commodity
A little comedy, a little perspective, a little of misunderstanding, a little stupidity, and a little game

For you to win or lose 

Fight Without a Faith, My Misty

I'm standing all the night
Watching UFC after the fight
I'm surrender to the bones
That makes me feel some pow!

I'm watching Netflix after the night
And all the crap not ain't that bad, right?
What can we do when there's a flight
That brings us into the match?

I know myself, I'm miles away
Watching the things that are bizzare
I feel my leg cannot be moved
So, I'm gonna fight without a faith

You hear me fight without a faith
Just sing along until it's day
Hope that the sun washed out the cold
But I saw that the day was out

I feel something unbeautiful
I hear my singing in the pool
I break my heart I break my day
Oh darling please don't go away

My Misty, please don't end the stay...